Though my maiden name is linked to a famous accounting firm and an international financial institution, I did not inherit the financial smarts nor the financial rewards associated with the name.
Thus, putting me in charge of our household budget was a crapshoot. Seriously, I failed high school accounting, but sure, let’s put me in charge of banking.
What could go wrong?
The truth is, I’m quite good at it. I have mastered moving money around like the old shell game. I get frugal and manic at the same time. It makes me an absolute joy to live with. I am not afraid to slash budgets, and suck the joy out of our lives for the sake of paying the utilities. Yep, I’m an absolute joy to live with.
So, when I suggested to my housemates, (all of whom, to be fair, contribute to the household income), that I felt it was fiscally responsible for us to cancel some television channel subscriptions, the panic I created was akin to that time I suggested Santa Claus and the elves were taking a year sabbatical and Christmas was cancelled. Lead balloon.
I’m sure our internet channels are on par with the average television consumer: Netflix, Amazon, Crave, Disney-plus, BritBox (because the best shows are on there) and despite my better judgment, some over-priced sports channel for NFL football that is useless to us beyond the season, but for which you can only have an annual subscription.
We binge watch a show, and when it’s done, we flip through the titles on all these channels and come to the same conclusion: there is nothing of interest to watch. I go read a book instead.
Guess what? Books are free if you use your library. Okay, they are not free, technically, because your tax dollars pay for libraries, but hey, that’s all the more reason to use your library. Get your money’s worth.
My threat to cancel subscriptions is seasonal, if I’m being honest. Summer means outdoor time. When I’m not at work, I want to be outside until the streetlights come on, just like the good old days when we didn’t watch TV because we didn’t have four million channels to choose from and also we weren’t allowed. Period.
I want to be out playing, even if at my age that means lounging in the garden, reading a book from the Muskoka chair I painted orange, so everybody would know it’s mine. What I don’t want to do is pay money for shows we aren’t watching, because we’re outside playing.
Why can’t I pause all these subscriptions during the every-day-outside months?
Summer means we have fun things I’d like to add to the budget, like excursions and activities we don’t do in the winter, when we basically hibernate. That’s the season where I will immediately regret not having TV subscriptions, if I follow through on this most fiscally responsible plan. If. Big if.
I also think I may get cable. And then add more channels. And then regret this whole thing, because I won’t be any further ahead. It’s a no-win situation.
All I know is, I better have a solution to this financial issue before the NFL season and the next Stranger Things release happens – and one that ensures access to both these subscriptions – because if you think I’m a joy to live with, you should meet my housemates.
