This may be a lofty goal, but if I write it down it will help me stay focused. Keep me accountable.
My word – no, my goal – for 2026 is to be unbothered. In the day-to-day unscripted, unscheduled life events that are sure to come my way this year, my ultimate goal is to be unbothered.
Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines unbothered as: not feeling or showing agitation, worry or annoyance.
I want that. I want to be like that. Not uncaring. Not lacking empathy or compassion. Simply not being bothered by the lessons that life continues to teach me. Right or wrong. Win or lose. Fair or unfair. Good or not-so-good. This year, I want to be less stressed, less anxious, less likely to be tricked into believing I can control the things that are beyond my control. Acceptance, not with resignation, but with an awareness of who and what is worthy of my time, and who and what are not.
Unbothered either way.
I know what you’re thinking. Easier said than done. If it were really that easy, everyone would do it. I think most people fake it until they make it. How often does someone tell you a story about being offended or hurt by a situation or another person and they throw out the “I don’t really care” line. Yet, you know for a fact that the only word incorrect in their phrasing is “don’t.” You know the truth. Oh, they care, alright. They care very much. Bothered.
The people who truly do not care about these daily life trip-ups don’t have to tell you they don’t care. No declaration required. They embody being unbothered because they actually are wholeheartedly unbothered. Some people are just so enlightened. These people fascinate me. I married one of them.
My husband, the Carpenter, is so unbothered by the things that fluster me that I’ve made it my mission to bother him daily with the sole purpose to crack the seal of contentment that is his essence. It’s a sport. Good thing we don’t keep score; I’d lose.
For me to truly be unbothered will mean a significant personality shift. It goes against my sensitive nature (which, for the record, is also my super power, but it didn’t come with a cape or a sexy outfit, so I just exist in a world that sees it as a weakness. If they only knew). Since I started writing this column, I’ve been bothered a multitude of times by world events, random people and mini-dramas that aren’t even mine. I’m clearly not emitting the unbothered aura yet. Eye roll.
I’m working on my unbothered reactions though, which is basically no reaction at all (because apparently the aforementioned eye roll is a sarcastic expression and thus a reaction. Insert another eye roll). I don’t have a poker face, but I am working on my blank stare. It feels appropriate. From Christmas to New Year’s Day, I will be practicing this facial expression in the mirror.
As we welcome in a new year, I hope you too will find the peace within to be unbothered by things that are beyond your control, and the faith within to know your response is your power.
You’ve got this.
We’ve got this.
Happy New Year.
